So Coca-Cola’s “Simply Orange Juice” is in fact not juice at all…or some shit.
I lost all interest with this article once I saw the word “algorithm”. Now I’m not really sure what an algorithm is, but it sounds like math, and I like most people… fuckin’ hate math.
In fact here’s a little math equation I’ve developed to explain how “Simply Orange” is made:
Coca Cola + fruit = algorithm(math + science and shit) = Simply Orange = fuck that X 3.14
Coca Cola is the Ron Jeremy’s boner of the soda world. The fact that people are surprised this “Simply Orange” isn’t made with whole freshly squeezed oranges is mind fuckening. I’m sure there are some oranges involved, but not your normal oranges. These oranges are probably strapped with a GPS at seedling with a live camera feed so you can watch each individual orange mature from a fuckin’ Facebook page. They are probably transferred by submarine to some underwater processing plant 10 miles beneath the sea to achieve the correct pressure to produce this shitty excuse of a “fruit” drink.
Anyways if you have some free time and feel like reading an article about nothing, here you go.
Many people choose Simply Orange juice because they believe it is a less processed, more natural choice than other brands. However, a new investigation by Bloomberg Businessweek shows that it is a “hyper-engineered and dauntingly industrial product.” Coca-Cola owns Simply Orange, which is made using a process they call Black Book. Since juice production is full of variables, including a peak growing season of only 3 months, this methodology was created to produce consistent orange juice year round. They won’t tell anyone how exactly the Black Book formula works, but the consultant who designed it, Bob Cross of Revenue Analytics, shared it with Bloomberg Businessweek.
Black Book is an algorithm that includes data about consumer preferences and the 600 flavors that make up an orange. Coke matches this data to a profile detailing acidity, sweetness, etc. so that they can blend batches to replicate the same taste and consistency. Black Book also incorporates external factors, such as weather patterns, anticipated crop yields, and cost pressures to allow Coke to plan ahead and ensure they have supplies on hand.
Coca-Cola’s Brazilian partner, Cutrale, processes the oranges, which are grown to Coke specifications. Satellite imaging allows them to order growers to pick their fruit at the best time, as determined by Black Book. The fresh-squeezed juice is stored in Cutrale’s silos and transported via a 1.2 mile underground pipeline to Coke’s packaging plant, where it is flash-pasteurized. It is then piped to storage tanks where it is slowly agitated and covered with a nitrogen gas blanked to keep out oxygen, which has been sucked out of the juice, as it will cause it to spoil.
The batches from different crops and seasons are separated, based on orange type, sweetness, and acidity. Blend technicians follow Black Book instructions, adding natural flavors and fragrances captured during squeezing back into the juice to make up for the flavor lost in processing. “When the juice is stripped of oxygen it is also stripped of flavor providing chemicals. Juice companies therefore hire flavor and fragrance companies, the same ones that formulate perfumes for Dior and Calvin Klein, to engineer flavor packs to add back to the juice to make it taste fresh. Flavor packs aren’t listed as an ingredient on the label because technically they are derived from orange essence and oil. Yet those in the industry will tell you that the flavor packs, whether made for reconstituted or pasteurized orange juice, resemble nothing found in nature,” explains Alissa Hamilton, author of Squeezed: What You Don’t Know About Orange Juice.
If you’re looking for an all-natural orange juice experience, free of algorithms and flavor packs, your best bet is to juice it yourself, go to a juice bar, or take Hamilton’s suggestion and enjoy a whole Valencia orange instead.