Bacon Wrapped Scallop Burger

What we’re doing here today is a little something I like to call cooking a burger like a fucking champion.

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I stumbled across a photo recently of a bacon wrapped burger (done up the same way you’ll see here) only it was filled with cheese. I was going to do one filled with French onion soup until a craving for scallops stage dived into my egg shaped fuck of a head.

The execution is simple. Burger bowl. Wrap with bacon. Season. Grill & fill.

Get yourself some fresh ground beef. I used 90/10 so it’s a little more lean than the 80/20 I would normally use. Form a decent patty and press the middle out to make a “bowl”. I used the bottom of a mug to help with this. You want to get in there with your phalanges and form it well. Wrap a slice of bacon around it and stick a toothpick in’er. Season the fuck out of it with some Old Bay before dropping on your grill. 

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You’re kind of fucked here if you’re looking for a medium/rare burger since you want the bacon to cook. You could always pre-cook the bacon a bit, that’s not how I fucking roll.


Once the bacon was cooked I flipped the burger over for just a couple of minute to add a char to the top side.

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In a small cast iron pan I cooked the scallops with a little seasoning. I was originally was going to stick bacon wrapped scallops on/in the burger but I had a feeling I wouldn’t have that kind of meat-based real estate…and boy was I fucking right.

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I spooned some sort of Cajun sauce in the burger. I’m not totally sure what the fuck it was since it was just some leftover sauce that came with some crab cakes I purchased. Stick as many scallops as you can comfortably fit in your burger bowl.

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My last little trick was the bun. I spread a thin layer of mayo on the buns and seasoned them with more Old Bay before crisping them up on the grill.

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There’s not much I would change with this sick as a bitch burger. You could raw dog it without the lettuce and tomato if you went heavier on the Cajun sauce. You need something. I avoided cheese because for some reason the thought of cheesy scallops made my dick shrivel like I was on an adderall bender. You could also season the scallops differently, maybe with a decent blackening spice.

The nicest thing about this whole operation is having the scallops sitting inside of the burger. When you take a bite they don’t go spilling over the sides like my fucking fat muffin top does over my jeans.

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