The Lasagna Taco may not be the taco we need, but it most certainly is the taco we deserve.
I’m not going to sit here and toot my taco-horn – but I’ve fucked up some shit in the taco world. We all have our talents. Some of us are great photographers. Some of us are great athletes. Some of us can twerk on a dick so well that you cause someone to lose their load in 3.6 seconds. Whatever talent-card life has dealt you just do what you do best.
For me that talent-card is turning foods into tacos that don’t necessarily need to be turned into tacos. (or do they…..)
This is actually something I’ve been working on for a few years. Yeah. Working on a taco…for a few years…I just said that. Constantly running into the issue of how to form a taco “shell” and have it look….lasagna-y?
After numerous failed attempts I finally nailed this fucker. Some mafalda noodles – little egg wash – and some shredded cheese. Thats its. Thats all you need to make this abomination.
One of my favorite things to do is hit the ol’ drive through window, grab a couple rando’s off the menu and make some sort of edible cardiac arrest.
According to my mad Google skills this Sunday is National Drive Thorough Day, which naturally sent me in the direction of the nearest drive through so I could try and get the creative juices flowing for you guys, and this weeks Sunday-Funday video.
This isn’t my first time throwing down with Wendy Thomas and her fucking spuds, are certainly won’t be the last.
It’s been a rough month for ol’ Kyle and his turd pipe over here. First, Burger King bends me over and gives the me ol’ ‘bite the pillow we’re going in dry’ when they dropped their Cheetos Mac & Cheese….whatever the fuck they are…a YEAR after I dropped the same fucking thing…and now the Cubs want to run a train on ol’ KyKy because they haven’t won a World Series in about 300 years and are looking to pull out a fucking “W”.
First we have to simply ask ourselves: Is it possible that some poindextery marketing cunt in a Cubs hat saw my deep dish Chicago dog pizza and ran up to some other poindextery marketing cunt in a Cubs hat and said “I’ve got an idea!”…
And the answer: of fucking course it’s possible.
Secondly we have to ask ourselves: is a month and a half enough time to jack an idea, get it all figured out, and have it ready to be sold at the ball park?
And the answer: I figured out the recipe in 5 minutes and I’m a fucking idiot. Of course it’s enough time.
Now, I’m not sitting here all jacked up thinking I deserve some sort of compensation if they did jack the idea from me, we all know they could use the money to get some decent players, but a little credit would be fucking nice if that’s the case. Hell I’d even take a few ball game tickets. I wouldn’t travel to Wrigley Field to see the game, but I’d drive myself 90 miles to Boston just to throw the tickets away.
The best thing about living on the east coast is that I don’t live in fucking California. Sometimes I flush my toilet and let my water run just for the fuck of it. Yeah I have some boys out there I got mad love for, but if I can’t step outside turn my hose on and wash my driveway…..well fuck me.
….But the cocks ain’t always bigger on the other side of the fence.
The worst thing about living on the east coast is that we don’t have a fucking In-n-Out. I mean, like, not for thousands of fucking miles. So I have to adapt. I have to animal style the fuck out of shit myself.