hashfuck# eating

[HOW TO] Breakfast Shooters

  The Breakfast Shooter. Not to be confused with a booze filled shooter. Unless you’re a sick enough fuck to pour some booze in, then I guess yeah, it’s a booze-breakfast shooter. I’m high. I’m a simple breakfast dude. Bacon, ham, or sausage…eggs, potato and cheese. I don’t need to be “woo’d” with a fuckin’… [Continue Reading]

The Most American Burger

If you ask me, and that is if you ask, the only thing this burger is missing is BBQ sauce, potato salad, bacon, and a fucking American flag waiving in the background.   From Eater: The Most American Thickburger will be one of the priciest items on the menu. Brad Haley, a marketing officer for Carl’s… [Continue Reading]

French Fry Burger Bomb

I didn’t really know what else to call this. I was originally going to call it the burger that fucked your mom, but I can’t think of a mom that could actually take this thing in the sack. So Burger Bomb it is. I used the same method with the fries as I did with… [Continue Reading]

What To Do With Those Shitty Thanksgiving Leftovers

Your greasy family has left your temple. Bellies full of your hard work and slaving away in a hot kitchen, while they drink your booze and fart on your fucking furniture. If they aren’t total grease juggernauts they may have left you with some leftovers to fuck around with. Leftover turkey soup? Fuck that. Thanksgiving… [Continue Reading]

The Struggle is Real Lasagna (Romsagna)

If you’re broke as fuck and don’t get paid for being a food blogger like myself and the million other idiots talking about food on the interweb, chances are you can’t afford a decent meal for yourself. You’re the caption and co-piolet of the fuckin’ struggle bus. You shower with dish soap. You wipe your… [Continue Reading]

100% Cheese Whoopie Pie

  I was lucky enough to check out the new “cookbook” from Thug Kitchen………………….. Wasn’t a single fucking ramen recipe in that bitch so fuck that. Thug Kitchen? More like the racist wankster cooking show. Theres nothing fucking thug about pumpkin chili. Thats basic bitch soup. This shit pissed me off so much I needed… [Continue Reading]

5 Burritos To Ruin Your Shitty Summer Chisel Chest.

          Burritos are basically the Bloussant of the food world. An all natural ingest-able for breast enhancement. Burritos don’t give a fuck if you’re a man, woman, child, tortoise, or fuck bird. You don’t have a pert rack? you will after choking down one of these 5 delicious as fuck food… [Continue Reading]

Cracker Jack Burger

A lot of people I shoot the shit with about my cooking all seem to have the same question…how do I come up with these shitty concepts? The answer is pretty simple. Some ideas just pop into my head out of the fuckin blue. Some are suggested by my wife. Some are plays on foods… [Continue Reading]

Ramen Sushi.

  Ramen and sushi go dick in hand. They are meant for each other. Often they are just paired together…but why not a ramen-sushi fuck orgy? Basically what I did was replace the boring as fuck regular old sticky white rice with some legit as fuck sticky shitty crushed up ramen noodles. If you cook… [Continue Reading]

[HOW TO] Cheddar Bacon Ramen Egg Roll

  Egg rolls fucking suck. Ramen egg rolls fucking rule. All you need is some wonton or large egg roll wraps, some cooked ramen, bacon, and shredded cheddar. Fold up the bottom corner of the shitty fuck wrap and place a pile of the ramen, mixed with bacon and cheddar on that bitch. Give that… [Continue Reading]