I wanted to create something I gave a fuck about. I wanted to create something all of you would give a fuck about. I wanted bacon and I wanted that shit stacked the fuck up because food tastes better when its stacked.
I didn’t want to waste my time with that slut Ricotta, so I grabbed the tits of her fat cousin, mac the fuck cheese, and swung from those cheesy ass nipple like a chimp in a fuckin banana tree.
If bacon companies were smart like I fucking am, the would sell pre-packaged bacon weaves. They could even put my name on the package for the idea so we could get rich together. Im trying to buy a private jet to get fuckin drunk in dammit. Im not going to fly that shit. Just gonna park it in my parents yard and fuck off in it.
Anyways here’s there deal. I sliced 1 pound of Hormel bacon in half and made a few bacon weaves. 6 slices per weave and cooked the tits out of it. Started stacking this bitch up from balls to cock tip. Sauce, bacon, mac, repeat. Toss some cheese on top and broil on low until its all melty and jizzy looking like the joey shot scene of a Asa Akira film