I’m not really sure what the exact blend of neighborhood cat your local Chinese spot uses for their spring or egg rolls to fill these dog shit-esque fried logs, but I can assure you this…
EGG ROLLS FUCKING SUCK.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about the legit as fuck rolls being made by a 140 year old grandmother in a 4 foot by 4 foot closet in the back of your local Vietnamese spot. I’m talking about the cat dander filled shit rolls made by PF Change down the street at your local Pu Pu Cat Wok.
The best way to avoid choking on your neighbors cat is to make your own rolls and fill them with a fucking number one. Thats right. Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions and fuck the sesame seed bun.